Helping Create Success
Webinar Success Tips
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hen I gave a webinar a few weeks ago, the subject of which was “Meetings You Won’t Want to Miss” I was shocked to learn that after speaking for 45 minutes on the subject… I still had 387 attendees and they had questions. About meetings??
Well…yes. And the point is that just about any subject can be made engaging if you make the right choices. In my case, I was asked to speak on the topic of meetings and I said I would but… I had misgivings. Meetings are boring, for the most part. People don’t like them. So I decided to state that at the very top-to confess my own negative impressions and take it from there. Choosing to open with the “elephant in the room” is stronger than ignoring it. If your topic is similarly bogged down with a negative reputation, it’s good to address it up front.
The other strong choice that I made was to include visual slides (cartoons, photographs etc) that were humorous. This works well for two reasons:
- images convey information much more quickly than words, so you don’t have to belabor the point
- the attendee is compelled to look at the screen, rather than just listening
The people running the event were able to see when attendees were actively engaged with their screens (I don’t know how as I wasn’t privy to that info) So in addition to having images to look at, I also had some simple bullet points on slides, which I did not read to them. It is the kiss of death, and most presenters make this common mistake. Listening to someone else read what is already written is dull, and slows your pace way down. Instead, allow a few seconds of silence when the bullet points come up. That way your audience can read it in peace, and your comments can pick it up from there.
Webinars are one of the most challenging forms of presenting to pull off well. They require a lot of preparation, and an understanding of language, both written and spoken. But they are well worth it for their ability to enable you to connect with larger audiences and to take questions
One of the biggest points I got questions on was my suggestion to make all meetings “Device Free” and having a collection basket placed by the door. What a difference it makes, and can kill the desire for a meeting in the first place! I recently did this at a dinner party, and I don’t know who took it worse at first- the teenagers or the over 60 year olds. It turned into a great success, and no one got hurt in the process.
When “You have strong opinions” is Really Code for Something Else.
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mmm. I’m wondering if other people have noticed the same thing. There are times when I’ve been told exactly those words (above) and in a tone meant to mildly shame or judge. As if having a less dynamic point of view would be preferable to the listener, as well as better suited to my gender, because the majority of people I’ve heard this from are men.
This begs the question: do men go around telling other men that they are very opinionated, and to tone it down? As my husband would say “homey don’t think so.”
So this week my calendar included coaching a senior executive with the ACLU, to prep for an upcoming presentation, and the stakes are huge. My strong opinions came in very handy, I can tell you that for sure. So I want to reassure all of us who might have been scolded for having a strong opinion- if it’s weak convictions you’re after, please seek them elsewhere…there are plenty of them out there. I’m proud to say I’m opinionated.
Five Confidence Killers
Lately I’ve been running workshops, interviewing people, giving quizzes, and lecturing on public speaking, which is not new. What is new is the nearly unanimous desire people are expressing for feeling more confident being themselves in public.
Contrast that with the ubiquitous presence of cameras in our lives, and I can see why so many people feel the need for some reassurance that what they have to say matters, and is worthy of attention and respect. We’re being judged left, right and center on social media and judging others in return.
Boomers, GenXers & Millennials—we’re all up against it here, with some of us faring better than others. Here are some tips for what NOT to do:
1. Comparing yourself to other people- oh, this is ever so easy to fall into, and is an utter waste of time and energy. No one else can be you, but you, so make the most of it. If you’re not yet sure who you are, start exploring on your own.
2. Believing your own PR- again, way too easy to do, and harmful to who you believe yourself to be. If you are living and dying by the numbers (of likes, clicks, open rates, stars etc.) then you are worshiping a false god. The numbers don’t add up to self-esteem.
3. Poor styling choices- how you look and sound to others matters to them, even if it might not to you. You’re judged on your appearance, and giving scant attention to it can leave you feeling uncomfortable if you’re standing out because of it.
4. Judging other people unkindly-when you succumb to this type of behavior, it will come back to bite you. You will look at the world negatively and expect to get that in return. And guess what? You will.
5. Too much: junk food, caffeine, sugar, alcohol, drugs- what do these have to do with confidence, you may ask? They keep your body out-of-balance, and that will affect your judgment, communication & the impression you make on people, and it won’t be a positive one.
Dealing With Harsh Criticism
Afew weeks ago, I gave a presentation on public speaking skills, which is something I do regularly. Normally they go well but this time, the person who produced the event was sharply critical of my performance. At first I was stunned, then furious, and finally I felt mortified and depressed.
Basically, I didn’t know what had hit me.
Plus, I was donating my time and the producer had seen me present before.
In a lengthy email, the tone of her comments was so biting that I couldn’t even begin to see what she was trying to say…it was frustrating to try to figure out what I had done to earn such wrath. Any valid points she may have had were lost on me. I started to question my skills and doubt myself…adding insult to injury.
What I learned from this is to let other people know when something like this happens. When I posted about it in a FB group among people I trust, the support and advice I got were the best possible antidote for the toxic feelings. Many advised waiting a few days before responding, which I did. It wasn’t easy, but it was right.
It was hard on my bruised feelings, but again, the group dynamic worked wonders on that, too. They were kind. Their points were rational and they had my back. I came to understand that you can’t stop what you’re doing when someone says unflattering, hurtful things. And you can’t hit back at them, either, so you’re best served to let it go. Quick as you can, and then shut the door on it and walk away.
In the meantime, I’ve given three more workshops, spoke on one tele-summit and did one virtual networking event on ‘advancing your career.’ These have all gone well, and I’m happy to say people have been positive and satisfied…BUT, part of me is going to be wary for a bit.
Five Confidence Boosts
Last month I presented a workshop to Millennials, and got the chance to ask them what qualities they most wanted for themselves, when speaking in public. They all said “I want to feel confident.” Many of them labeled themselves as “introverts” and I finally had to ask why so many of them were doing so. That’s when they told me about the book Quiet, and where this trend comes from. So I made a note of it, and just finished the book. Here’s what I think:
My heart goes out to the many souls who find themselves expected to be “on” when they’d rather blend in. With ubiquitous recording devices (we were right-Big Brother is watching!) it can be unnerving to try to intuit how to simply “be.” To feel free of self-consciousness is a gift everyone deserves to have. It makes life much easier, not to mention much more pleasant.
Confidence can be created, nurtured and grown. I know this from personal experience, as well as professional observation. There are many tips for this, and here are my top five for today:
1) Speak well of yourself, to yourself. “Self-talk” is incredibly influential on our mood and energies. Negative inner thoughts will play out, as will positive ones. The key is to tune in to them and pay attention. Sometimes it can be way too easy to jump on a train wreck of mental images of what we don’t want to happen. The law of attraction doesn’t care what images and ideas we have…so if we can’t protect ourselves from toxic thoughts, no one else can. Be kind and supportive to yourself, first.
2) Give yourself enough time to arrive on time. Feeling rushed is a confidence killer; it throws you off your game and puts you in a reactive mode, instead of proactive. The control you’ll experience each time you arrive somewhere on time (or early) will help stabilize your inner energy and feed your sense of self.
3) Stand up straight, pull your shoulders back. Too much screen time has given many of us a hunch in our posture. When we stand up and unfurl ourselves, we open up the rib cage and give our lungs more room to breathe. Deep, diaphragmatic breaths are an effective way to ground the whole body and feel calm.
4) Unplug yourself before going to events. It’s better to begin to gather a sense of yourself, physically and mentally, well before you arrive at the door of your next event. Too often, we use the final minutes just before a meeting or a networking event to cram in one more email or text. Real time requires your attention and presence, where the online tasks can often wait. Give yourself the best support you can, so you’ll be able to make the most of your face time with people.
5) Eat whole foods that keep your blood-sugar even. It might not seem related, but how well-nourished we are or are not plays a big part in how we feel and how we come across. If we haven’t eaten well, we might get light-headed, lethargic and dull-feeling. That energy will send a certain message, that can only get in the way of feeling steady and stable. And always drink plenty of water to stay hydrated.