Dealing With Harsh Criticism
Afew weeks ago, I gave a presentation on public speaking skills, which is something I do regularly. Normally they go well but this time, the person who produced the event was sharply critical of my performance. At first I was stunned, then furious, and finally I felt mortified and depressed.
Basically, I didn’t know what had hit me.
Plus, I was donating my time and the producer had seen me present before.
In a lengthy email, the tone of her comments was so biting that I couldn’t even begin to see what she was trying to say…it was frustrating to try to figure out what I had done to earn such wrath. Any valid points she may have had were lost on me. I started to question my skills and doubt myself…adding insult to injury.
What I learned from this is to let other people know when something like this happens. When I posted about it in a FB group among people I trust, the support and advice I got were the best possible antidote for the toxic feelings. Many advised waiting a few days before responding, which I did. It wasn’t easy, but it was right.
It was hard on my bruised feelings, but again, the group dynamic worked wonders on that, too. They were kind. Their points were rational and they had my back. I came to understand that you can’t stop what you’re doing when someone says unflattering, hurtful things. And you can’t hit back at them, either, so you’re best served to let it go. Quick as you can, and then shut the door on it and walk away.
In the meantime, I’ve given three more workshops, spoke on one tele-summit and did one virtual networking event on ‘advancing your career.’ These have all gone well, and I’m happy to say people have been positive and satisfied…BUT, part of me is going to be wary for a bit.