H
ow to screw up your presentation:
- Procrastinate. Wait until the last possible minute to think about your message, your intention and your knowledge.
- Once you’re good and nervous because you’ve waited so long, sit down in front of the computer to write your speech.
- Start typing whatever comes to mind. Spill it all out onto the page.
- Print it out in a size 10 or 12 font.
- Don’t rehearse. Don’t get to know it, or to own it. Just read through it to yourself.
- Drink lots of coffee on the day you present.
- Grab whatever clothes you want and same with shoes.
- Manage your stage fright by imagining your audience in their underwear.
- Start by telling everyone how nervous you are.
- Speak as quickly as possible, to get it over with.
And that’s all it takes! Follow one or all of these and you’ll be giving it less than your best, and putting yourself through hell, and abusing the audience as well. Or, you can do the opposite and give yourself a fighting chance. More on that, anon.
